I think I'm turning 29 I think I'm turning 29 I really think so....
I guess there's a lot worse things to be turning -- like purple, or up dead -- but I. Feel. Old. A guy I work with told me that on the morning of his 30th birthday he threw out his back getting out of bed, so I should be warned: There's one year left on the warranty.
To be honest, I don't actually feel old. I'm not sure how to describe how I feel. There are no valid reasons for me to feel old. I'm in the best shape of my life, even running my first marathon a couple of months ago. At worst, most of the hair I had 10 years ago is still there. I have very few "adult" things to worry about in my life. I'm not married. Never have been. I have no children, no mortgage, no real debt. I have a career, and that is pretty much my only "adult" concern.
Maybe that's my issue? Maybe I should be more "adult" by now. (I'm going to keep putting that word in quotes, because I don't know how to define it). I'm 29 and live in the Midwest. To many that means I'm suppose to married with kids, own a house in suburbia, drive an SUV, and complain about how poor I am, how expensive gas is, how I no longer have time for [fill in hobby here]. I'm none of that. I like my hobbies.
The last time I celebrated a birthday without a girlfriend was in 2004. 311 played a free concert in the park. Brad and Dana started dating that day. They now live in Denver. The next two years, we all partied on the rooftop of a building in downtown Omaha. Those parties included Holly, Josh and Ginny, who now live in Oklahoma, Travis (Dallas), and Andy (Omaha), Jon and Molly (Pittsburgh), Brad and Dana (Denver), Andrea and Brian (Omaha) and others. Last year, if I remember correctly, it was just Holly and I. This year, it will be me with my roomates, Kyle, Lindy, and Brian.
Perhaps I feel old because it feels as though I've gone full circle. Like I've moved on to a whole new life with a whole new group a friends, and am going to try it again. Granted, I still to talk to everyone listed in that last paragraph, some (Ginny, Josh, and Jon) more than others (Holly). But none of them will have a drink with me tomorrow, when I "celebrate" moving one year closer to the end of the warranty.
Maybe I feel old because my life is pretty much the same as it was four years ago, just with a different cast and a better job. If I'm this old, should I have more to show for it?
1 comments:
Do you remember as a kid always wanting to "Grow up" and then as an adult it seems like you're an 'adult' for so long and you want to go back to being a kid with none of those "adult" concerns.
Who says what you have isn't "Showy" enough? It seems like the other "adult" version is depressing and you seem far from depressed. No one says you have to follow the Married by 25 with 2.5 kids, a cat a dog and a white picket fence. Doesn't that seem boring?
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